You can say that reading cultivates character, that it inspires the mind, and that it adds wit. But to say that one's speech is tasteless and one's appearance repulsive is absolutely unacceptable.
Huang Tingjian said, "If one doesn't read for three days, one's speech becomes tasteless and one's appearance repulsive." This is a famous saying containing profound truth. Reading is not a beauty treatment, but it is related to one. Women adorn themselves for those who appreciate them, and what ordinary people call "beauty" is nothing more than powder, cosmetics, and perms. Little do they know that even after powder, cosmetics, and perms, one can still be tasteless and repulsive. This applies to both men and women. I think of Xie Daoyun's husband, Wang Ningzhi. I imagine Ningzhi was certainly not unattractive, and they were a good match in terms of social standing. Daoyun's displeasure probably stemmed from Wang's lack of wit. Therefore, when Xie An asked his niece, "Wang Lang, the son of Yishao, is quite good-looking, why do you resent him?" Daoyun replied, "Among my uncles, there are A'da and Zhonglang; among my cousins, there are Feng, Hu, Jie, and Mo. I never imagined that in this world, there would be a Wang Lang." I personally conclude that Wang Lang was simply too inarticulate and lacked any sense of humor. Therefore, sitting with a handsome but empty-faced man every day in her boudoir was truly tiresome. Li Qingzhao's first marriage to Zhao Mingcheng was very harmonious. Why? Because they shared the same interests. Later, Mingcheng died in the chaos of war. Qingzhao then married some wealthy and powerful fool, and was filled with regret. Daoyun was known for her eloquence. When Ningzhi's brother, Wang Xianzhi, debated with guests, he was at a loss for words and reason. This sister-in-law was able to send a maid to tell her brother-in-law, "Please help my young master out of this predicament." She then concealed herself with a blue silk screen and refuted the guests. In this light, Wang Xianzhi was undoubtedly a dull and tasteless fool. A person without humor is worthless.A person's character can be seen from their speech. Wang Xianzhi was too opinionated. If Daoyun asked him to go to the movies today, he would agree. If Daoyun said no, he would agree. If she wanted to see a Western, he would agree. If she wanted to see an erotic film, he would agree. Wouldn't this infuriate Daoyun? The sisters of the Grand View Garden in *Dream of the Red Chamber* are all revealed through their conversations. Ping'er's gentleness and loyalty, Fengjie's shrewdness and resourcefulness, Xiren's cleverness and refinement, Qingwen's tantrums and naiveté, Daiyu's intelligence and quick wit, Baochai's magnanimity and generosity, even Baoyu's quirky remarks and the simpleton's dullness—all are evident in their speech. You can say that reading cultivates character, that it inspires the mind, and that it adds humor. But tasteless language and an unpleasant demeanor are absolutely unacceptable.
Some say that idle talk can ruin a country. I say that idle talk can ruin a country, and so can a lack of it. The Neo-Confucian scholars who "idly discuss morality in times of peace, and then die for their ruler in times of crisis" also ruined the country. The Eastern Jin Dynasty fell because of idle talk, and the Southern Song Dynasty also fell because of those who did not engage in such talk. Therefore, it is wrong to blame idle talk for the downfall of a country. King Zhou of Shang fell because of Daji; do you think this tyrannical ruler could have survived without Daji? Tyrannical rulers and despotic monarchs bring about the downfall of their countries, and always find a scapegoat to bear the blame. Because of the corrupt politics of these incompetent rulers and the arrogance of military figures, even a man of integrity like Ji Kang could not escape death. Therefore, pure conversation (or "pure talk") arises from tyrannical rule, not the other way around. Confucian scholars have always reversed cause and effect, failing to consider this deeply.
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