I don't know when it started, but some articles on this platform love to talk about life, which kind of life is more carefree, hobbies like flower arranging, striving upwards, hard work and perseverance, skills—whatever they say, they always end with a blessing like "this kind of life will be even better."
The fees for these articles are quite considerable. But I'm not willing to train myself to write in these areas; it doesn't align with my values. Hobbies and skills are like romantic encounters. I might start brewing tea because I like the tea from a water town while traveling, or I might start painting because I'm used to seeing beautiful scenery, but I can't start a hobby just because it's purely a hobby. Because there's no emotional foundation. Any hobby, if it becomes something to share and show off, immediately turns into a chore. Once life is successful, you have to live for others, and that immediately becomes tiring.
Skills are the same. A happy person shouldn't possess all sorts of skills, because they are often forced out of necessity for survival. Like a salesperson who can stand all day without complaint, smiling at people, and doing everything cleanly and efficiently. Like a writer who, even with a cold and fever, will still finish a short story at the computer. These trained skills aren't really something to be happy about. Truly admirable skills are often discovered and honed through self-discovery and practice, like the old man in Peach Blossom Spring who said, "It's not something to be told to outsiders." Anything imbued with emotion is something one is reluctant to let others judge. Like a private treasure, it's kept secret to avoid harsh criticism.
Don't speak ill of someone's unique qualities, because that might very well be their strength. If someone is diligent and hardworking, don't say with a wary tone, "He's very ambitious." If someone is intelligent, quick-witted, and creative, don't say with a disdainful tone, "She's a bit strange." I've seen many such petty people, heard countless bad things said about me, and heard all sorts of insincere praise, all without any polite criticism.
If it's not particularly egregious, I usually just laugh it off, or say something like, "Not necessarily, for example, etc." Then the person falls silent, clearly disliking me.
Many people around me actually enjoy interfering in other people's lives, down to the smallest detail: if someone's handwriting is neat, they think your cursive is truly ugly. Some people, feeling restless and anxious about their own lives, assume others' leisurely moments are signs of mediocrity and a lack of ambition. Others, noisy and chattering, claim quiet people are introverted and can't integrate with others. Then, after getting married, they go around advising others that it's a matter of basic human decency. Life is never short of gossips who twist trivial matters to define your character and future. You
walk your own path alone; how can someone focused on their own journey have time to talk to others? I despise such people who call themselves friends; they lower the very definition of friendship!
What matters is knowing where you're going and how to get there. Nothing else really matters—your age, achievements, or what your options are if one path fails. Just
keep walking and see what happens. Ignore those who criticize you; after all, you'll only find a handful of truly supportive people in your life. Don't waste your energy on people who aren't worth your attention.
Worrying about whether or not you can make friends with others is pointless. I prefer to categorize these people as colleagues or classmates rather than friends. Friendships require mutual understanding, not hurtful words.
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