If one day I disappear...

 If one day I suddenly disappear, perhaps occasionally someone will remember my existence, the laughter I brought, and will still think of me a little. But perhaps soon, no one will remember what I look like anymore, and everyone will return to their own lives.

　　Time is the best healer; it doesn't leave people in perpetual pain. Similarly, time makes people forget everything unimportant, everything that shouldn't have been in their lives in the first place—including appearance, personality, temperament, and the things they did, whether beneficial or not—all forgotten, as if they never existed. If one day I'm gone, I can't imagine how long it will take for everyone I've met to forget my name, my appearance, my personality. Maybe quickly, maybe they won't even care. If one day I'm truly gone, then I believe that soon everyone will return to their own lives, and I will be forgotten, because time, under the baptism of time, nothing intangible or nonexistent can resist time; it will be completely obliterated. So, I understand: if one day I cease to exist, who remembers and who doesn't will no longer matter. Will all the mistakes no longer trouble others? If that's the case, then I don't need to worry. Perhaps some people are born to be remembered, and some are born to be forgotten. But, if I'm gone one day, who will finish what I haven't done? Who will do it for me? No one—that's terrifying. I still have so much to do, so many regrets to undo. If I'm gone… no, perhaps my very existence was a mistake.

After watching "Waiting for You in the Future"

 　　I've always enjoyed reading novels.

　　Yesterday afternoon, I finished reading *Waiting for You in the Future*, a novel I recently bought from the bookstore.

　　To be honest, after finishing it, I was filled with mixed emotions.

　　As I mentioned, *Waiting for You in the Future* is a novel by Liu Tong. I don't know much about Liu Tong, except that he also wrote *Who's Youth Isn't Confused*, *Your Loneliness, Though Defeated, Is Still Glorious*, and *Towards the Light*.

　　*Waiting for You in the Future* is a youth-oriented, inspirational novel. The protagonist's name is Hao Huigui (Liu Dazhi). The plot tells the story of a 36-year-old protagonist who finds a diary he once wrote in on the street, which transports him back to his 17-year-old self, leading to a series of events after he confronts his younger self.

　　How to put it? If you asked me to describe the specific story, I wouldn't know how. I'm writing this article simply to briefly share my thoughts on the novel *Waiting for You in the Future*.

　　I must admit, the author's imagination is rich, allowing the future self to communicate face-to-face with the past self, enabling the future self to regain hope for the future and readjust the direction of their life through this dialogue.

　　Calling this novel an inspirational story is no exaggeration.

　　This novel also made me understand many things. I believe that everyone is an independent individual, and the direction of their own life should be determined by themselves, rather than blindly following the demands of others. For example, the 36-year-old protagonist, Hao Huigui, has always followed his mother's wishes. In the story, he is a university teacher, a job that his mother and everyone else thinks is stable and good, but the protagonist doesn't like it, yet he is powerless to resist.

　　I love the novel's cover, the words written on the cover image, the beautiful sentences in the novel, and the group of passionate teenagers in the novel.

　　If one day you suddenly wake up and find yourself back in high school, with your parents still young, your friends and you still having dreams, what would be the first thing you want to do?

　　People are afraid of rusting; once the door to the outside world is closed, and the lock rusts, others can't get in, and you can't get out. Therefore, life is always full of surprises. I believe that once you put your heart and soul into something, even if the outcome isn't what you imagined, fate will surely give you the best possible result.

　　Your future self will thank your present self for your hard work. Only through effort can you avoid regrets and feel no remorse. I'll be waiting for you in the future, embracing you at every crossroads.

　　(End of article)

Don't let your temper block your good fortune.

 　　It's often said that people with good tempers are blessed, and that they are certainly well-mannered. No matter the situation, we should never be slaves to our emotions; we must learn to control our emotions, not be controlled by them. I

　　just saw this article on the WeChat official account "Reading with Style," and I thought it was quite good, so I'm sharing it with you all.

　　In this world, encountering setbacks is perfectly normal, and experiencing occasional annoyances and frustrations in life is also perfectly normal. However, if emotions erupt, normal things can become abnormal.

　　American social psychologist Festinger has a famous judgment known as "Festinger's Law": 10% of life is made up of what happens to you, while the other 90% is determined by how you react to what happens.

　　Festinger once gave this example:

　　A couple, the husband, while washing up in the morning, casually placed his expensive watch on the sink. The wife, afraid it would get wet, casually took it and placed it on the dining table. Their son went to the table to get bread and accidentally dropped the watch, breaking it.

　　The husband was furious and gave their son a good spanking, then berated his wife with a long face. The wife protested, saying it was for his own good; otherwise, what if his watch got wet? The husband, however, thought she was worrying unnecessarily; his watch was waterproof.

　　The couple had a huge argument, and in a fit of anger, the husband left without eating breakfast and drove to work. Near the office, he realized he'd forgotten his briefcase and immediately turned back home.

　　His wife was at work, their son at school, and the keys were in his briefcase, so he couldn't get in and had to call his wife for the keys. The wife rushed home, knocking over a fruit stand and having to pay for the damages.

　　After getting his briefcase back, the husband was already 15 minutes late and received a scolding from his boss. His mood was terrible, and before leaving work, he got into an argument with a colleague over a trivial matter.

　　The wife also lost her perfect attendance bonus for leaving early, and their son, playing baseball that day, performed poorly due to his bad mood, being eliminated in the first inning.

　　In this case, the broken watch was 10% of the problem, while the subsequent series of events constituted the other 90%. If the husband hadn't lost his temper in a moment of anger, the remaining 90% of the misfortunes wouldn't have occurred.

　　Looking closely at our daily lives, don't similar stories often happen around us?

　　There's a saying that reminds drivers: "Better to stop for three minutes than risk one second." When encountering any unpleasant situation, whenever our hearts are troubled, we should remind ourselves to stay calm. Don't say whatever comes to mind, because words spoken are like spilled water—they can't be taken back.

　　Why is it that a person with a bad temper lacks good fortune?

　　First, a bad temper also leads to poor interpersonal relationships. Everyone has dignity and cares about their image. If you keep dwelling on someone's minor flaws, they will definitely be unhappy, regardless of what kind of person they are. In short, the distance between you will widen. Bystanders will also keep their distance.

　　Good interpersonal relationships open up more opportunities, so good fortune naturally follows.

　　Second, a temper easily leads to irrationality; impulsiveness is the devil, so don't lose your temper easily. History provides numerous examples to support this.

　　When Liu Bang was at a disadvantage in his struggle for power against Xiang Yu, Han Xin conquered Shandong and sent someone to Liu Bang, saying that the people of Shandong were unruly and needed a high-ranking official to maintain order. Han Xin requested that Liu Bang appoint Han Xin as a "false king" of Qi.

　　Initially, Liu Bang was furious, already overwhelmed by Xiang Yu's defeats. Instead of helping him, Han Xin demanded an official position. He slammed his fist on the table, about to erupt in anger, when his advisor stepped on his foot as a reminder. He then snapped out of his rage and shouted, "What 'false king'? Give me a real king! Issue my order: appoint General Han as 'false king'!"

　　Without Chen Ping's warning, Liu Bang's outburst might have ruined the Han dynasty, and the empire might have fallen to Xiang Yu instead.

　　Most importantly, a bad temper is harmful to health. Psychological studies show that being unfriendly and easily angered increases the risk of coronary heart disease and hypertension, and temperament is also related to lung function.

　　Traditional Chinese medicine also believes that people with bad tempers and prone to anger often have liver dysfunction or even organic lesions, which TCM often attributes to "liver fire."

　　The Romance of the Three Kingdoms recounts how Zhou Yu, in his battle of wits with Zhuge Liang, consistently lost, and his anger flared up, leading to a fatal attack of his heart disease. Before his death, he lamented, "Since Heaven gave birth to Yu, why did it also give birth to Liang?" A bad

　　temper truly shouldn't be excessive; if it is, one should try to manage it. Some say that temper and fortune are inversely proportional; the worse the

　　temper, the worse the fortune, and the better the temper, the better the fortune. I believe this is true. If a disabled person becomes self-conscious or gives up on themselves because of their disability, and lacks a

　　good temper, they cannot emerge from darkness into light; if a person suffering from a chronic illness is constantly irritable due to depression, they won't live long either. People with good tempers have good moods, good health, and smooth sailing in all aspects

　　of life. Having a good temper brings good fortune, and thus, everything. Therefore, wise and rational people will not let a bad temper affect their daily luck!

　　...

At 19, my life became about finding ways to make money.

 　　A lot happened to me when I was 19. First, I realized the person I liked was actually disgusting, and I lost all desire for love.

　　Second, I realized that pursuing education wouldn't be any better than dropping out, and I didn't want to be a naive student anymore.

　　Third, I realized that if philosophy and literature couldn't be converted into money, it meant there was something wrong with my abilities and thinking, or that I wasn't diligent enough. From someone who wrote pure literature and insisted on reading pure literature, resigned to my fate, I went into commercial writing. From initial resistance to later complete certainty that I was just a vulgar person who liked money and stories. I left the dream of saving the world to others.

　　 Fourth, although my parents didn't earn much money and had very outdated views, offering no other quality options besides learning a trade or teaching, I still chose to compromise and earn some money first. I resolutely refuse to talk about sentimentality, dreams, poetry, or distant places. Even if it's vulgar, I just want to keep expressing myself and then make money. Putting myself on a pedestal is just being pathetic.

　　The fifth thing I learned is to not value knowledge as much as I value reading and writing. If something can't be monetized or help me make money, I won't pay attention to it. I stop browsing Zhihu (a Chinese Q&A website), and I no longer write whatever I want. I've even shed laziness, the so-called "reading mindset" and emotions, and that composed demeanor. I write what others want to read, I write about emotions, and I've carefully defined my target audience as women under 25 with a little spare cash. I'm just an ordinary, down-to-earth woman; I'm no longer trying to be high-class. I'm not an elite, so I won't become one. Waiting ten years to hone your skills is too much of a waste of time!

　　The sixth thing I realized is that becoming more grassroots and ordinary is an inevitable trend, and younger people are a normal part of it. The money we can earn always depends on our own efforts—keeping an eye on trends, thinking critically, and acting decisively. Even reselling knowledge through platforms is acceptable. Earning money gives me freedom and is the fastest way to increase the value of my time.

Instead of thinking about why I can't make money or why my writing is bad, I should try to focus on developing ideas instead of focusing on my shortcomings! Everyone's abilities are about the same; it's just a matter of experience, effort, and hard work. When you have nothing, you can't just do anything and still try your best.

Please don't reject my love for you.

 Fairy tales often feature four characters: a prince, a princess, a knight, and Cinderella. Usually, the prince and princess end up together, while the knight silently protects her. Cinderella, though in love with the prince, is from a different world.

I watched a TV series called "Love Wakes Up," where the prince, princess, and knight grew up together. The knight always silently protected his princess, while Cinderella entered their world later, leading to a love triangle and then a love quadrangle. Whether the prince and princess or the prince and Cinderella end up together, in these love triangles or quadrangles, someone will get hurt. The best outcome is for them to be with the right people.

If someone loves you, if someone is good to you, please don't reject them outright. Having such a person in your life is not easy, and it's a beautiful thing for you. People should learn to cherish what they have and not wait until it's gone to regret it.

Please don't reject my love for you, because loving you is a happy thing for me.

...

The Li Yutong of that time is dead; the current her is Niohuru Yutong.

 Now, Qianlong knew the situation was hopeless…

01

September in the capital finally brought autumn.

Having just escaped the sweltering heat, the palaces and gardens were reviving, and rumors were spreading like wildfire.

“Have you heard? The news from Xiaolingzi is that Empress Gao is going to be reinstated.”

“Don’t spread rumors. What if Consort Li hears this?”

“She’s just a mere consort. If the Empress really gets reinstated, we’ll all have to turn our attention elsewhere. Who will care about her?”

“I’ve heard that Consort Li has some leverage…”

“Greetings, Consort Wan!”

Consort Wan raised her phoenix eyes, glanced at the two servants, pretended not to have heard anything, and left. Passing through three gates and turning two corners, she arrived at Consort Li’s residence.

"Sister Yutong, the rumors are spreading throughout the palace. What are your plans?"

"What plans do I have? They're all baseless. Don't listen to those servants' nonsense, sister."

"I... I know you have feelings for the Emperor, sister. Back then, my brother from our hometown and I were separated and brought into the palace. The Emperor wanted to depose me because I refused to serve him. It was only because of your connection that I've had so many years of peace. Now that the storm is brewing, I will definitely stand by your side."

Consort Li picked up the teacup on the table, but without taking a sip, she put it down again. Seemingly not hearing Consort Wan's words, she murmured: The Emperor can reinstate anyone, but she, absolutely not...

02

Less than three days later, the imperial edict arrived in Qianxi, and Empress Gao was restored to the throne.

The palace was decorated with lanterns and colorful streamers, as if a joyous occasion had been held. The position of Empress had been vacant for several years, and now that it had been returned to its rightful owner, many more romantic rumors circulated among the people.

Speaking of which, there have always been many rumors about Empress Gao among the people.

Generally speaking, once a concubine was deposed, unless she came from a prominent family, she could continue to live in the palace; those of ordinary status mostly became prisoners. When Empress Gao, of humble origins, was deposed, she should have been sent to prison. However, for reasons unknown, the emperor decreed that she be given a quiet and beautiful palace garden to live in, and it was rumored that he secretly bestowed upon her a thousand taels of gold, ensuring she could use the money to cultivate relationships within the palace and live a life of comfort. The

year Empress Gao was deposed, the national treasury was empty, and the country was beset by internal and external troubles. The emperor himself was in dire straits, yet he treated Empress Gao generously, spending lavishly on her. This inevitably sparked speculation. The common people simply said that Emperor Qianlong was deeply affectionate.

Many years later, the Qing Dynasty had long since passed its most difficult period, the national treasury was full, and the people lived in peace and prosperity. Some speculate that the deposition of the empress was merely a temporary measure, intended to protect Empress Gao from the palace intrigues, and that she would be reinstated once the court and the country were stable, clearly intended for her to enjoy a life of luxury.

Countless young women in the capital wept upon hearing this beautiful story, deeply moved by the emperor's affection.

Meanwhile, in a dimly lit corner of the palace, Consort Li was also secretly wiping away tears, her handkerchief clenched tightly, as if she had made an important decision.

03

The day after Empress Gao's restoration, large posters appeared throughout the capital, their bright red characters resembling a blood oath.

Crowds had already gathered around them, making it impossible to move. The posters

, in essence, claimed that the current emperor, Qianlong, had not quelled the rebellion that followed Empress Gao's deposition through normal means, resorting to assassination, framing, and all sorts of despicable methods. They alleged that many loyal ministers had been murdered that year at the emperor's behest.

Most importantly, they claimed that the national treasury was empty that day, and the emperor, in collusion with Consort Li, had used undercover agents to engage in private business and raise funds to overcome the crisis. In other words, there was a time when imperial majesty was nothing more than a golden abacus in the hands of the concubines in the palace; those stories of turning the tide and cleverly defeating enemies were all false.

The current emperor was nothing but a coward.

Before the emperor even arrived, a girl of thirteen or fourteen rushed to the wall and tore down the blood-written letter.

"Don't look! This is a boring lie told by idle people! The current emperor is definitely not that kind of person!"

Her cry was met with a hundred responses, and many girls echoed in the crowd. The people were divided into two factions: one believed the blood-written letter as if it were a treasure, while the other was furious, believing that someone was deliberately slandering the emperor with ulterior motives.

Meanwhile, in the palace, the emperor was already sitting in front of Consort Li. He clenched his fists tightly, but his face remained gentle.

"Yutong, how are the elders at home these days?"

Yutong just smiled silently and did not answer.

"The matter of Empress Gao..."

A cold glint flashed in Consort Li's eyes. She suddenly raised her head and looked directly at the emperor.

Qianlong ultimately did not speak, but lowered his eyes and turned to leave.

Upon reaching the door, Qianlong stopped, turning back to look at Yutong, who was still smiling. Her once beautiful voice was now completely silent.

"I'm sorry about the child, but there's truly no possibility between us anymore. If you insist on a fight to the death today, I can only do my best to protect myself."

With that, he stepped over the threshold without looking back.

Three

days later, a new blood-written letter appeared in the city, much shorter than the previous one.

It claimed that the previous letter was all fabrication, that the noblewoman Li was merely a commoner who had never had the opportunity to overstep her bounds, let alone wield royal power to replenish the national treasury single-handedly. It also alleged that Li had behaved improperly in the palace, maintaining close ties with the imperial physicians, and that the emperor, in his magnanimity, had not stripped her of her noblewoman status.

The report even included handwritten copies of Li's correspondence with the physicians to prove its authenticity.

Meanwhile, news spread that a new blood-written letter had been found on a city gate in the eastern district, and the same group of people headed off to the other side.

The blood-written letter from Dongmen stated that the accusations of treason were pure fabrication, and the contents of the letter were all forgeries. It further claimed that three years prior, Emperor Qianlong, disguised as a commoner, had broken his leg during a private visit to Jiangnan, yet still persisted in observing the people's conditions, a story that became a legend—but

this was all a lie. The truth was that Qianlong was riding with Consort Li, and due to his poor riding skills, the accident occurred. Consort Li broke her leg, but Qianlong was unharmed. The story was then told that the emperor had been injured while observing the people's conditions, thus winning popular support.

For the past few days, people of all ages in the capital had been searching for new blood-written letters, moving from east to west and west to east.

Every time soldiers came to clear them away, within an hour, someone would secretly replace one somewhere—like a wildfire that couldn't be extinguished, only to spring up again in the spring breeze. However,

the truth could not be

hidden forever. Both factions held their own versions of events, but there was only one truth.

Not long after, a painting by a Jiangnan artist reached the capital.

The painting depicts the current Emperor Qianlong and Consort Li. The two smile radiantly, riding a magnificent steed, with the painter's own annotations accompanying a poem describing the emperor and consort riding together, only to be thrown from the horse due to its fierce nature. The

painting was created three years prior.

Upon its appearance, people had already formed their own judgments. Many folk painters even created forgeries, hoping to spread this story of horseback riding. Deceiving the emperor is

punishable, but deceiving the people will have dire consequences.

Taking advantage of this opportunity, the pro-Ming forces began to stir, recruiting soldiers and exchanging favors with high-ranking officials.

A new storm was brewing within the palace.

That day, Consort Wan came to see her sister, Yutong, again.

Consort Li was examining an embroidery when she saw Consort Wan arrive and rose to greet her.

"My dear sister, you have such a refined taste."

"Not at all, it's all because I have a good sister. Who else but you immediately wrote a letter to clarify the matter after the blood-written letter accused me of having an affair with the imperial physician?" "

That so-called letter record is laughable. You think you can tarnish your reputation with such baseless evidence? It's just a small matter, sister, don't take it to heart."

"Fortunately, the painter saw my predicament that day and secretly sold the painting, otherwise, I really don't know what would have happened."

"Sister, don't worry. At this critical moment, the emperor wouldn't dare to find an excuse to retaliate against you, your family..."

"Shh, walls have ears."

06

Today, the people did not receive the blood-written letter, but instead, a yellowed letter was posted on the wall in the east of the city for the first time ever.

Nearly a hundred people gathered around the small letter, and someone even copied it in larger characters for everyone to see.

The letter was signed by the current emperor, Qianlong!

The Li family was originally Han Chinese, and their influence had been secretly linked to the Manchu Qing dynasty. To outsiders, they appeared impoverished, but in reality, they had connections with merchants and Ming restoration groups

, making them authoritative intermediaries. When the Li family became pregnant and was granted the title of Noble Lady, the court was beset by internal and external troubles. To maintain peace, Qianlong had no choice but to ask his father-in-law to temporarily stabilize the Ming restoration groups, promising to make the Li family empress after the child's birth.

Unexpectedly, not long after the court stabilized, the Li family was forced to ingest saffron, lost her child, and fell out of favor. All the efforts the Li family had made for the imperial family were in vain.

This letter was Qianlong's explanation to the Li family, a reassurance.

The letter also bore the emperor's seal; there was no mistake.

The crowd erupted in uproar.

07

Qianlong stormed into Noble Lady Li's palace and smashed a teacup.

"Why must our affair be made known to the whole world?"

Lady Li murmured to herself, her mind already wandering.

"I said, anyone is fine, but not her..."

"If you truly don't want her to be reinstated..."

Consort Li picked up a shard from the ground, playing with it in her hand. She accidentally cut her hand, but didn't cry out in pain, only gently sucking on it.

"My target is no longer Empress Gao..." Consort Li raised her head, her gaze sharp as a knife, slashing at the emperor. "There's nothing left to discuss between us! My Li family's money and effort weren't meant to benefit you two. Over the years, you've played a very elaborate game."

Qianlong knew the situation was hopeless, and there was no point in further discussion. He staggered into his sedan chair and summoned his trusted ministers.

Everyone simply lowered their heads. Only Minister Zhu had tears in his eyes, lamenting the calamity of beautiful women.

The restoration of the Ming dynasty among the common people had been brewing for a long time, and the charity auction held in the palace to support the Fourth Prince was already poised to begin. Several blood-written letters, the storm of years past seems poised to return… Three years ago.

Jiangnan , by the Slender West Lake. A five-mile radius around the lake was already under martial law. A beautiful couple sat by the lake, a magnificent lion-like horse led by an attendant. The woman was no more than eighteen, yet a piece of jade around her neck was priceless. She nestled her head on the shoulder of the man beside her. “I truly wish I could hold onto this moment.” “Then let it be. I promise you, our love will never change.”

So-called fame

 　　I firmly believe that stories of famous people and celebrities are unbelievable, because the truth is always far more tragic and realistic than what we hear. You don't know how many nights of agonizing, self-disciplined effort went into their rise to success.

　　I really like a seemingly insignificant line from *A Tale of Two Cities*, which says that every window, and even every door within that window, in the dark, crowded house holds its own story. I don't like to downplay these stories. Everyone has their own struggles, and everyone's life is difficult, which gives me a basic respect for everyone.

　　The stories aren't like what the news media portrays, where everything seems so hard-won. How much he persevered, how much he worked, how he finally stumbled upon an opportunity and succeeded. These are really boring, but this is the kind of narrative I've been exposed to since childhood. Is this a valid way of expressing things?

　　I stand on the bridge admiring the scenery, and you look at me from elsewhere. We're both like this, easily imagining others' perspectives as better than our own. Some studies have shown that among the tens of thousands of thoughts a person has each day, some revolve around speculating about others, some around relationships, some around the self-deprecating sense of failure, and some around self-reflection. Tomorrow, the same mistakes will repeat themselves.

　　The media paints stories in a positive light, but as a human being, ask yourself: Don't I have many dark thoughts? Don't I live a decadent life that I enjoy, seemingly indifferent every day? Yes, because I truly don't know what life was like for Apollo, the sun god.

　　I admit I'm a failure, someone who doesn't care much about success, and rather pessimistic about life. Instead of constantly thinking about what I might gain, I'd rather simply tell myself: give up, don't think about anything. I spend my days indulging in unfounded fantasies, wasting energy on things completely unrelated to real-world well-being, but I enjoy this life. You might think it's dangerous, but as long as I'm happy, that's all that matters.

　　Reading and writing, in the end, isn't a particularly glorious thing. I think everyone can do it, everyone can write something different; the only difference is that I, this fool, will stubbornly persist. I like this kind of unproductive pursuit. This work isn't like a proper job.

　　I don't want to find any meaning in it, because philosophy is what gave birth to humanity. Only in this way can we reflect like dust, can we live and die, can we willingly die, and can spend our waking hours in stories. Therefore, the existence of any kind of writing should be allowed.

　　Your existence should be allowed. In that case, fame really should be something to be ruthlessly told to get lost. When awarding prizes, when attending events, those who have endured many blows in life and fantasy, those with weathered faces, are probably thinking: Forget it, what's there to say? I myself don't understand what's going on.

　　I humbly say: I'm a lucky one. Life can be summed up in two sentences: As long as I'm happy, as long as you're happy.

　　Fame stems from people's voyeuristic desires, always craning their necks to see other people's lives or stripping naked to tell others how they live. I find this disgusting, it's from the same source as a couple eloping in feudal times being stoned to death.

　　Overcoming the obsession with fame is a good thing, but also a difficult one. However, I'm happy to do it, as long as I'm happy living my life. I don't want my words to bear too much responsibility, like the idea that literature should convey moral principles; being pretentious is exhausting. This is how people born in the 90s think, so I don't really want to hear about many of the issues that are being discussed.

You must throw away these four things!

 1. Get rid of those who don't love you.

As the saying goes, "There are no two people who are perfectly suited from the start, only two hearts that need to work together." But if you meet someone who doesn't love you, even if you change yourself beyond recognition, you still won't catch their eye.

You may prefer late-night red wine, but you're willing to cook him porridge in the morning; you may love lipstick and high heels, but you're willing to go makeup-free for him. The more you compromise yourself, the more you'll receive in return for his contempt and disdain.

It's not that he's heartless and doesn't understand love, it's just that his tenderness isn't for you. Forced relationships are never sweet; let go of those who don't love you. Your kindness will eventually be appreciated!

2. Get rid of relatives who look down on you.

Relatives are supposed to share blood with us, be people we can rely on, and provide warmth. But relatives are a mixed bag, and many of them look down on you from the bottom of their hearts.

If you want to start your own business and ask them for a loan, they won't even listen to your plan, refusing you with the excuse of being short of money. It's not that they really don't have any money, but they're afraid you won't be able to repay it.

You leave your hometown to work hard elsewhere. If you do well, they think you've just had a stroke of luck. If you do poorly, they won't care; instead, they'll criticize you for "messing around."

These relatives only measure your worth by your salary and earnings; your efforts and ideals are truly insignificant to them.

3. Discard insincere friends

. Insincere friends are common.

When you're successful, they seem to spring up around you like mushrooms after rain. They praise your youth, talent, and abilities in public, asking you for favors, but behind your back, they speak ill of you and expose your embarrassing moments.

When you're down on your luck, they turn on you faster than flipping through a book, silently blocking you from their contacts before you even ask for help. Adversity reveals true friendship; it's easy to see people's true colors in times of hardship and disaster.

True friends are for life; don't associate with insincere friends. A group of casual acquaintances can never compare to one true friend.

4. Ditch the meaningless drinking parties.

"Fame and fortune lie in the wine glass, relationships are hidden in the dinner table," but those drinking buddies who are always with you are completely unreliable when you encounter emergencies. Instead of attending these meaningless parties, spend more time with your family; they are your strongest support!

"Different circles, no forced integration." Spending all your time at parties attended by leaders and big shots, getting drunk, yet still no one notices your existence.

Don't attend these meaningless parties; you neither please others nor demean yourself. Instead, focus on being a better version of yourself. With real ability, you'll be qualified even without actively seeking it out!

Learn to let go of the old to embrace the new. Discard unnecessary people and things to travel light and invite more valuable people into your life!

(End of article)

Why do some people seem friendly but prefer to be alone?

 Why do some people seem friendly but always keep to themselves? The top-rated answer on Zhihu succinctly puts it: "Being friendly is a matter of cultivation, being a loner is a matter of personality."

It seems I'm that kind of person. I generally dislike conflict and try to avoid unnecessary arguments. Harmony brings wealth, and valuing peace is my guiding principle.

Even if someone deliberately stirs up trouble, I try to restrain myself unless they cross my bottom line.

The reason I keep to myself is because I have too many things to do—endless books and movies to read, and numerous social activities to attend. There's no need or energy to waste on people I don't connect with. But what I can do is quickly switch gears when social interaction is needed, entering an extroverted, witty mode.

If you see me keeping to myself, it might just mean I don't have much to talk about with you, not that I'm lonely. I might be having a great time with another group of friends, you're just not in my circle.

From a psychological perspective, extroverts enjoy being in crowds and relish the feeling of being the center of attention. When alone, introverts often feel bored or uneasy. They prefer solitude or spending time with only one or a small group of people. Too many people around them are too exhausting. As I mentioned in a previous article, personality traits can be viewed as a spectrum, with introversion and extroversion at opposite ends. This means that people have varying degrees of introversion and extroversion.

In our perception, introverts are often seen as loners, always aloof, while extroverts are always cheerful and enthusiastic. However, this isn't entirely true.

Our behavior and interpersonal interactions are influenced by our education, the era we live in, and our family environment.

Most of us are not entirely introverted or extroverted. Introverts learn how to handle interpersonal relationships due to their upbringing, education, and family. Extroverts may gradually become more introverted due to changing circumstances.

How we socialize is primarily controlled by dopamine, a hormone that makes us feel good. The release of dopamine in each person's brain differs, resulting in varying degrees of stimulation to the cerebral cortex.

Those who are naturally more easily stimulated are introverted; they tend to avoid any additional social stimulation as it can cause anxiety and lead to excessive energy expenditure.

Conversely, those who are naturally less easily stimulated are extroverted; less stimulation leads to boredom, so they seek out additional stimulation.

Most people's stimulation levels don't reach either extreme; they fluctuate. Sometimes you feel the need to do something to seek stimulation, while at other times you feel overwhelmed and want to suppress it.

Why do some people seem friendly but prefer solitude?

1. It's not aloofness, but selective socializing.

When you perceive someone as solitary, it doesn't necessarily mean they lack a social circle; it might simply mean you haven't yet entered their social circle.

As we age and experience more, we gradually understand who is worth our time and who is merely a casual acquaintance. All interactions depend on whether the people around us are to our liking.

I once saw a quote, "Be kind only to a few, and to the rest depending on your mood!" I deeply agree.

2. Being alone allows us more time

to connect with others. However, prolonged interaction inevitably leads to fatigue. After all, everyone is different, and our pace of life varies.

Whether you're working or studying, have you ever encountered this situation:

"Who wants to eat?"

"Me, wait five minutes!"

Twenty minutes later, "Okay, let's go!"

Actually, I'm already starving… Perhaps we can accept it once or twice, but what if this happens repeatedly?

A physics teacher's words from my school days still resonate with me: "If you used that time waiting for others, I don't know

how much you could accomplish." As a child, I thought my teacher was indifferent, but looking back, it's simply because everyone's pace is different.

We all need ample time alone to recover from the fatigue of interacting with others and to recharge our energy. Or we can use that time to do things we want to do, determining whether we need to allocate more time for ourselves based on our own pace.

3. A friendly person who is also an introvert:

Such a person can be very friendly because their education and family influence have made them less rude, and good habits prevent them from being aloof. However, they are an introvert, preferring solitude and disliking excessive social interaction.

For introverts, this desire for solitude is not just a preference; it also affects their health and mood.

Introverts expend a lot of energy on social pressure and communication, so they need time to recover alone. Long-term suppression can lead to the accumulation of negative emotions, triggering a greater reaction.

Finally, I want to say that the happiness of social interaction comes from the quality, not the quantity; from the depth, not the frequency, of communication. I am not a loner, but I value the quality of my friends.

(End of article)

Those who complain about their background

 　　I've always believed that people who complain about their background, their job, and their circumstances are unambitious. Complaining is different from criticism. Complaining means you don't know where the problem lies, you can only curse and resign yourself to fate. Criticism means you know where the problem lies, who is right and who is wrong, which side to follow, and the resulting conflicts. A critical spirit is a necessary component of becoming an independent thinker, while complaining is a standard feature of the weak.

　　Within criticism, criticizing one's surroundings and one's most personal things is a natural phenomenon. That's why I like writers who criticize and sympathize with those at the bottom of society; nothing is more realistic than this subject. My own passion is humanity, and I admire writers who are passionate about humanity, like Dostoevsky, who is my mentor… Criticism is literature and art, intellectual; complaining is human nature. People in reality are quite dull, while literary figures are incredibly rich.

　　What exactly are people who complain about their background complaining about? They complain about not having good resources, good opportunities, good timing, missing opportunities, missing their prime. All their complaints never involve self-reflection, never reflecting on why they are actually complaining about being mediocre. This is a vicious cycle. The power of the environment is immense. This is why China currently lacks qualified teachers and overall education; everyone relies on self-study, some even keeping their children homeschooled. Poor road conditions lead to everyone driving. Food hygiene is a concern, so everyone cooks for themselves. Moral and public opinion are poor, and public security is weak, forcing everyone to rely on self-defense. Living in China requires mastering a wide range of skills. This is truly frustrating; everyone around us makes life feel incredibly insecure. Take robberies, for example; the victims are mostly working-class women. In rape cases, the victims are often ordinary, conservative working-class girls. They are generally cowardly and don't target the wealthy, powerful, or famous. While there's a saying, "People fear becoming famous, just as pigs fear growing fat," the reality is that those at the bottom of society feel the most insecure. Economically, life is incredibly difficult because production creates little value. Conversely, demand is high, leading to significant consumption. The working class and farmers are the biggest consumers, yet they only receive the cheapest, lowest-quality products. Manufacturers rely on them to clear their discounted inventory. On a safety front, living in a big city often means poor security and little personal safety. Psychologically, the lack of money can lead to a lack of respect, lower self-esteem, and hurt feelings of worth. Marriages are frequently plagued by a lack of communication and constant arguments. Therefore, complaining about one's background is useless; it blinds them to their situation and diminishes their motivation to change it.

　　They choose to live in this terrible environment, enduring contempt and humiliation day after day, pitying their misfortune and angering their lack of resilience. Isn't that right?

　　Those who are critical tend to fare better. They can improve their lives under various favorable conditions. Their lives revolve around seizing opportunities to climb the social ladder, preparing for them, and diligently learning, never giving up hope. They believe life is like a function, with its highs and lows, and they remain humble and resilient.

　　If the teachers are unqualified, they can find a mentor; if the environment is unfavorable, they can create one—can't they just hide away? If education is poor, they can go abroad; if life is difficult, they can work hard; if grades are poor, they can find a mentor and study diligently—grades will eventually improve. This is the power of critical thinking; those who complain will forever remain stagnant, or even worse off.

　　Complaining about one's background seems like a particularly good excuse. It's similar to excuses like "I'm young," "I'm old," or "I'm a woman"—it's laughable. What kind of excuse is it to use physiological phenomena?

What do you think is the most difficult thing about learning to write?

 　　Analytical skills are incredibly important; you need to be meticulous, carry a notebook to jot down your thoughts every day, read the oldest and most classic books, write the most unrestrained and free-spirited language, and disregard everything. Some people who can't distinguish between reality and writing might try to find fault, asking if you're writing about them. But these aren't the hardest parts, nor is the daily persistence the most difficult.

　　The hardest part is discovering your own heart, revising those ideas again and again until the writing becomes polished, not just writing them down and calling it a day. After writing, you need to put it into practice, see if it's feasible in reality, and consider how you'll revise, think, and write it years later. If someone hasn't even written a single pure literary novel, no matter how many essays and miscellaneous writings they produce, they're not a writer. And if their novels are a mess, utterly unreadable, like plain water, they're still not a writer.

　　The hardest part of literature is finding large chunks of free time amidst a busy schedule, still writing well, not wasting time, and continuously improving based on learning. This improvement leads to a level of insightful, inspired thinking, not just grueling practice. Grueling practice is largely useless for writing; without inspiration and other high-level thinking, it's pointless.

　　The hardest thing is for a highly talented person to also learn diligently—not just talk, but to write calmly, revise calmly, and overcome all difficulties to do this. Even after starting work and having relationships, it's difficult to keep writing and maintaining this focused approach. It's tough being a person and doing things in China; there are so many people and so much talk.

　　Being able to work and learn throughout one's life is a blessing. No matter how much pressure makes us thoughtful or prone to aging, it's still a kind of luck. Work helps you avoid bad habits, illnesses, the noise of gossip, pressure from family to get married, and many unpleasant people. It helps you escape poverty, emptiness, boredom, and bad relationships. It helps you shed your past, less desirable self. Don't always complain about work. I love working and learning, but I'm not a workaholic; working too hard is unnecessary. Write calmly, learn calmly. Calmness doesn't mean slow; calmness is the fastest way. Without work, you are nothing; you'll soon despise yourself.

　　The hardest part of learning to write is using the time others spend complaining to cherish and enjoy, to treat others' suffering as something to enjoy, to genuinely seek out hardship, to make the difficult easy, and to appreciate, record, observe, learn, and work while others are slacking off. Let those negative, constantly complaining colleagues, leaders, classmates, teachers, parents, and people who create tension around you go to hell.

　　Tell yourself that you are living, not suffering.

Don't interfere in other people's lives.

 　　​​I don't know when it started, but some articles on this platform love to talk about life, which kind of life is more carefree, hobbies like flower arranging, striving upwards, hard work and perseverance, skills—whatever they say, they always end with a blessing like "this kind of life will be even better."

　　The fees for these articles are quite considerable. But I'm not willing to train myself to write in these areas; it doesn't align with my values. Hobbies and skills are like romantic encounters. I might start brewing tea because I like the tea from a water town while traveling, or I might start painting because I'm used to seeing beautiful scenery, but I can't start a hobby just because it's purely a hobby. Because there's no emotional foundation. Any hobby, if it becomes something to share and show off, immediately turns into a chore. Once life is successful, you have to live for others, and that immediately becomes tiring.

　　Skills are the same. A happy person shouldn't possess all sorts of skills, because they are often forced out of necessity for survival. Like a salesperson who can stand all day without complaint, smiling at people, and doing everything cleanly and efficiently. Like a writer who, even with a cold and fever, will still finish a short story at the computer. These trained skills aren't really something to be happy about. Truly admirable skills are often discovered and honed through self-discovery and practice, like the old man in Peach Blossom Spring who said, "It's not something to be told to outsiders." Anything imbued with emotion is something one is reluctant to let others judge. Like a private treasure, it's kept secret to avoid harsh criticism.

　　 Don't speak ill of someone's unique qualities, because that might very well be their strength. If someone is diligent and hardworking, don't say with a wary tone, "He's very ambitious." If someone is intelligent, quick-witted, and creative, don't say with a disdainful tone, "She's a bit strange." I've seen many such petty people, heard countless bad things said about me, and heard all sorts of insincere praise, all without any polite criticism.

　　If it's not particularly egregious, I usually just laugh it off, or say something like, "Not necessarily, for example, etc." Then the person falls silent, clearly disliking me.

Many people around me actually enjoy interfering in other people's lives, down to the smallest detail: if someone's handwriting is neat, they think your cursive is truly ugly. Some people, feeling restless and anxious about their own lives, assume others' leisurely moments are signs of mediocrity and a lack of ambition. Others, noisy and chattering, claim quiet people are introverted and can't integrate with others. Then, after getting married, they go around advising others that it's a matter of basic human decency. Life is never short of gossips who twist trivial matters to define your character and future. You

　　walk your own path alone; how can someone focused on their own journey have time to talk to others? I despise such people who call themselves friends; they lower the very definition of friendship!

　　What matters is knowing where you're going and how to get there. Nothing else really matters—your age, achievements, or what your options are if one path fails. Just

　　keep walking and see what happens. Ignore those who criticize you; after all, you'll only find a handful of truly supportive people in your life. Don't waste your energy on people who aren't worth your attention.

Worrying about whether or not you can make friends with others is pointless. I prefer to categorize these people as colleagues or classmates rather than friends. Friendships require mutual understanding, not hurtful words.

In reality, no one is truly happy.

 　　Maslow said that human desires are endless and complex, but at their root, they all stem from different levels of needs. Maslow's hierarchy of needs includes five categories: physiological needs, safety needs, social needs, esteem needs, and self-actualization needs. In short, when a need is constantly suppressed, it leads to frustration and psychological problems. Everyone has some degree of these problems, and no one is truly happy.

　　Perhaps someone is ridiculed for their unusual appearance or physique, and this becomes a visible scar. I once read an extreme example: a village boy, very fat, was mocked and bullied by everyone. One day, he killed the person who stopped him on the road with a brick. From then on, he became obsessed with the feeling of killing, dragging everything from the village cats and dogs to passersby and even city dwellers into the bushes to die. Although he pretended to live a normal life, he was a habitual murderer. There are many more kind-hearted overweight people who are ridiculed, harboring inferiority complexes. They laugh and joke with you, but they are actually very concerned. Every year they try to lose weight, taking diet pills until they vomit, but it's still useless. Because of their weight, they often have to be the understanding and caring one, perhaps all they want is for you not to laugh

　　at them for being fat. There are also some very intelligent children who, because they were born in backward and isolated places, may have loved reading but had no books from a young age, may have always been ostracized for silently working on number games and pondering their own questions, and may have never received an educational environment suitable for them because of their different way of thinking. Traditional education has only been misleading and distorting them, and they will always feel very lonely. They yearn for self-actualization, but their level of self-actualization is too high, so no one can satisfy them or discover them. They may be surrounded by cold words of ridicule and attacks. These attacks come from uneducated parents, gossipy neighbors, teachers who lack insight, violent and reckless classmates, the resistance from a system that does not encourage critical thinking, and the resistance from authority. Amidst layers of setbacks, some may passively accept their fate like Fang Zhongyong, ultimately fading into obscurity; others may succumb to the tides of frivolity, becoming sophisticated egoists, spending their days scheming against others and finding pleasure in revenge; still others may succumb to the power of the evil side, becoming wicked geniuses; or perhaps, like a slow bird that doesn't fly, they lay an egg, hoping their child will fulfill their own aspirations. Only a few can maintain their original aspirations throughout their lives, walking the arduous path of self-realization and innovation. Therefore, no one is truly happy, and a healthy professional is far superior to an unhealthy one.

　　Some may aspire to be ordinary people, adapting to society and living ordinary lives. Neither entirely kind nor entirely evil, they might hide when things happen, cultivating a quiet sense of shamelessness, yet never daring to commit heinous acts. They might remain silent bystanders, or fan the flames, or instigate trouble, acting for their own benefit, toiling like oxen just to raise their children.

　　What should we do when faced with these situations? What should we do when faced with other situations? In reality, no one is truly happy; everyone has their own troubles. Life is like a river; no matter what's beneath the surface, one must pretend everything is fine. Everyone has their own problems. If you cling to the darkness, you'll be blind to the light, blind to your parents and blood relatives, blind to the opportunities for education and work, blind to your deep interests and talents, blind to your teachers and friends, blind to the happiness within you, blind to the beautiful things. Often, darkness is more of an imagination than reality; it's the worst kind of writing and the lowest kind of fantasy. When things happen, you can cope.

　　Because life won't give you difficulties far beyond your capacity. Like solving a problem, being willing to think, do, and take responsibility to the end is the best approach.

　　In reality, no one is truly happy. People define happiness as something they've longed for, and when that's fulfilled, it's only for a fleeting moment, because perfect happiness doesn't exist. Therefore, clinging to this starting point will trap you in a whirlpool. Many young girls dream of meeting someone who loves and understands them, marrying for love, having a child, and thinking that life is perfect. So she toils away, clinging to dreams of happiness, betting everything, believing that all her setbacks and anxieties will be soothed and offset. All she needs is this, she thinks, and she doesn't need anything else. But when all these things come true, after a few days of satisfaction and joy, the happiness vanishes, leaving only problems and hardships. She then feels cheated and vents her resentment on her children and husband. The idea that a man's ambition and wealth will bring him happiness is also a false proposition. Some fools still consider this a lifelong regret, pressuring their children. Can you call them mature? If success is defined as making a lot of money and having status, then success is a low-probability event. If you believe success is raising your children to adulthood and ensuring their healthy growth, then you are very likely to succeed. When you see your children grow up, you will feel genuine joy, and you will understand and support their own wishes instead of imposing your own.

　　My child, I hope your definition of success is being a healthy self-actualizer, a cheerful, open-minded, truly wise and composed person. When you change your goals and broaden your mind, as the days and months pass, time will transform you into that kind of person. Never doubt this; as long as you strive to get closer to your goals, that's better than anything else!

　　Everyone is worthy of envy because life still presents us with some challenges for us to solve, and it still gives us opportunities to think and act. For me, this is the greatest fortune, because no matter the outcome, as long as you've tried your best to solve it and made an effort, you are the best.

My thoughts on bicycles

 　　(1)

　　I remember when I was little, compared to my friends, I was the quietest and most introverted one. Usually, they would come to my house and invite me to parties.

　　When my friends got together, I would just quietly watch them laugh and joke. Although I was happy too, I rarely smiled.

　　My friends would look at me and feel that I didn't seem to have any extra expressions on my face, so they would tease me to their heart's content, making me cry and laugh. At that time, I was very "weak," and they often made me both laugh and cry.

　　I don't know if it was due to physical reasons or other reasons, but my limbs were not very developed. Every day, my parents would urge me to go out more, breathe some fresh air, or exercise.

　　As I mentioned before, from the third grade of elementary school, I fell in love with learning and books, so I missed a lot of outdoor activities.

　　As the years went by, we gradually grew taller and older. My friends were still as lively as ever, and I was still as quiet as ever. However, despite this, I felt that the distance between me and them was getting farther and farther. Sometimes I could hardly keep up with their pace. They love playing badminton and table tennis, ice skating, cycling, watching horror movies, and following celebrities. Almost all of them own a bicycle and a pair of roller skates. These sports are very simple to do.

　　I have always stood beside them and watched silently without saying a word. Sometimes, I suddenly feel that I have become accustomed to being a spectator.

　　I once learned to play badminton with them, but I gave up halfway because I felt that I did not like playing badminton and wanted to do what I was interested in. Later, when they saw that I did not like playing badminton, they stopped forcing me to learn from them.

　　Later, each of them got a bicycle and often went out to ride bicycles together. For many people, riding a bicycle is not a difficult thing. And I also admit that riding a bicycle has many benefits for us.

　　(2)

　　Compared to cars, motorcycles, and electric vehicles, I still prefer and like bicycles. In the past, I never cared about these things.

　　Because I am often quiet, my friends often teased me, and they felt that I was very aloof. Hearing their jokes, I wasn't surprised and didn't want to say anything; I guess I just tacitly agreed.

　　We live in a modern world, and many people can ride bicycles very skillfully—that's something everyone can see. But for me, looking at bicycles always evokes mixed feelings. On one hand, I look forward to the day I can ride a bicycle freely on the road; on the other hand, I'm secretly annoyed that I'm such a grown-up and still can't ride a bicycle, and it seems I just can't seem to master the technique. Although, in reality, I've only ridden for two hours.

　　I've only heard that cycling can help with weight loss; I haven't actually verified it. However, it's true that it's good exercise. And, on a nice day, riding a bicycle is sometimes a pleasure—looking at the beautiful scenery, feeling the breeze, listening to music on your phone with headphones on—how carefree! What's more, couples can ride together on the same bicycle, one driving in front and the other holding onto the person in front, just leisurely enjoying themselves, isn't that great?

　　I've already shared my thoughts on bicycles above. Actually, bicycles are really great. That same night, watching my friends having so much fun riding their bikes, I decided to beg my family to buy me one too. Perfect, it'll be good exercise. However, I didn't realize how much I still need to learn about this bicycle. I guess it'll take a long time to master it!

　　...

　　(End of this article)

How important is it to lay a good foundation in your youth?

 　　Without the experience of the elderly, we cannot pursue wisdom; without the maturity of the middle-aged, we cannot pursue success. We must lay a solid foundation!

　　Teenagers and young adults in their twenties lack the wisdom and insightful eyes of the elderly, the inner weight of the middle-aged like fruit on autumn branches, the mature composure and quiet joy of success, and the pure childlike innocence and creativity—all of which we have possessed and will possess. Focus on building a solid foundation, mastering knowledge and skills, doing the most, meeting the best and most people, and doing the most diligent and honest work.

　　The backdrop for young people should always be vast mountains and seas, boundless grasslands, and expansive blue skies. We are eagles soaring in the sky, galloping steeds, ready to explore and try new things. Of course, bring the wisdom of your predecessors, the philosophy of the past and present, the opportunities given to you by the appreciation of successful people, and the undying creativity of your childhood. Settle down like a galloping steed or a soaring eagle, to explore and try. The world will be a vast plain for you. Horses are simple, passionate, brave, and intelligent; eagles are sharp, swift, and fierce.

　　At this stage, what's important is reflecting on and memorizing books, mastering pure knowledge and skills, training your mind, strengthening your body, and keeping your life organized, belongings tidy, and yourself clean and refreshed. It's about honing the fundamentals of each interest to perfection, maintaining a consistent frequency of diligent imitation and learning, having many admired teachers to learn from, implementing their earnest teachings, and working diligently every day to become their prized student, even harder than they were in their youth. Diligence and hard work will lead to success.

　　Study each subject well, earn credits, participate in activities, earn scholarships, achieve perfect attendance, and understand how to respect and utilize rules—only then can you grow healthily. At this stage, independence is paramount. It means doing your job well, having a job that supports you, and taking it seriously. If you find a management job, understand capital and business operations. If you find a technical job, develop it to a unique level. For every ordinary job, cultivate unique skills before leaving. If you don't meet your own standards, persevere. If you have a job, dedicate yourself to it, meeting as many people as possible. If you find a job you love, cherish it and realize its full potential. Continue to develop your hobbies if you have the capacity, but don't put the cart before the horse, because health is paramount; hobbies are always just a supplement.

　　Talent and hobbies are the most beautiful parts of life; learning and work are fundamental. For self-actualizing individuals, neither should be neglected. Those who haven't built a solid foundation, like Jia Baoyu in *Dream of the Red Chamber*, live a life of luxury yet seek revenge and retribution, unwilling to read the Four Books but instead engaging in Zen meditation, viewing scholars as utterly useless, are themselves incompetent aristocratic young masters, lacking even the responsibilities of their status, spending their days associating with people like Xue Pan and Feng Ziying. He possesses talent and refined aesthetic taste, aspirations that transcend the mundane, but his aristocratic status creates a contradiction between talent and virtue. However, he's unwilling to devote any energy to the daily tasks he dislikes but must undertake. Before he can recognize the incompatibility between his beliefs and society, and find solace in life (like Cao Xueqin's highly specialized writing), his family is raided, and his eventual renunciation is quite plausible—otherwise, wouldn't he have become a novelist? Is

　　n't some of the deliberate zero-score phenomenon in contemporary college entrance exams also rooted in this mentality? The unrealistic pursuits and fragility of youth are brutally crushed on the whetstone of reality. People like Jiang Duoduo and Xu Mengnan pitted foundational knowledge against aspirations. Instead of focusing on building a solid foundation, they dreamed of the future and pursued their dreams, neglecting practical work. Netizens saw this as hype, but it was simply their own foolishness. Ji Jian, online name Canghai Xinkong, understood philosophy, science, and literature, but to express his rebellion against the education system and the lack of understanding from his parents, classmates, and teachers, he deliberately scored zero on the college entrance exam, then worked on a construction site, writing a book titled "Living Like a Dog," a true record of his journey. However, through hard work and deep reflection, he became a boss and author. No matter what a person does, a solid foundation is paramount. Without a strong foundation, one cannot live; without a strong foundation, one cannot be a good young person; if one cannot be a good young person, one may not be a good middle-aged person; if one cannot be a good middle-aged person, one may never live a good life.

　　Young people writing books should still learn from masters, hone their language skills—be concise, humorous (no writer doesn't think their style isn't humorous)—and improve their vocabulary. Don't worry about whether the writing is good or bad. Everything happened naturally. If I wasn't there, I simply wasn't there; I was far from it. Therefore, I'm definitely not a genius. IQ tests are foolish, just as believing in intelligence is the most unreliable thing. Cleverness alone will never lead to lasting success. Some say Nietzsche was out of touch with the times; I think he was ahead of his time, not backward. We might look down on those who are behind the times, but we simply can't see the visionary ones. Youth allows for trial and error, but it shouldn't lead to real mistakes. Efforts in the wrong direction might not yield results, but someday those results will surprise and comfort you, as long as we keep moving forward.

　　Don't dwell on others' success; think about what paths you can learn from, constantly focus on how you can live your life well, and continuously expand your horizons. That's all.

Knowledge and common sense

     There's a fashionable saying these days: "You can lack knowledge, but you cannot lack common sense." What is knowledge? What is common sense? In my view, when we are young, everything we see, hear, and are taught is knowledge. But as we mature, some of the knowledge we use to interact with others gradually becomes common sense. For example: one plus one equals two; directions like east, west, south, north; boys can't use women's restrooms; the strokes of Chinese characters; and so on.

    It seems that common sense that we don't use often is knowledge, and vice versa. Common sense isn't necessarily knowledge, and knowledge isn't necessarily common sense. It's like a fruit that isn't an apple, but an apple is certainly common sense—perhaps even a bit like "a black horse is not a horse."

    Knowledge at the very beginning of life is certainly common sense, but after integrating into society, common sense is no longer necessarily knowledge. There are two reasons for this: First, because we are like blank slates at the beginning of life, our understanding is superficial, and those who enlighten us are also indifferent. Many pieces of knowledge become common sense later in life. We memorize them without fully understanding their meaning, and with simple instruction and a little practice, they become common sense. However, the complex and profound knowledge can only be truly understood and applied at different times and to different degrees, depending on individual aptitude, after we have memorized it thoroughly. This is like memorizing the pinyin table, the Chinese dynasty anthem, or the periodic table when we were young. Although we learned them without fully understanding, we later applied and practiced them with a clearer understanding. Secondly, much of our common sense, namely etiquette, comes from our subconscious habits passed down over thousands of years. Perhaps these very things were taught by uneducated elders in the beginning of life. This is like a mother teaching her daughter to be a virtuous wife, to be a good wife and mother, and to respect her elders; it is like a father teaching his son to be a strong and upright man and to be careful in choosing friends. These things, passed down from their ancestors to their fathers who lacked formal education, are also being passed down to their sons through their own example.

    I've always been amazed that in a nation with thousands of years of culture, it's always been a small group of intellectuals who interpret the outward symbols of our culture. Meanwhile, those uneducated village elders, barely literate, use their words and deeds to verify the essence of our culture and pass on its spirit, making it like a torch that has never been extinguished for millennia, illuminating our path forward. Of course, we can view them as a wordless book, a book whose greatest characteristic is that it uses the appropriate knowledge and discards the inappropriate. Perhaps what is used is called knowledge, or common sense. And the unused book knowledge, still called knowledge by intellectuals, whether true or false, we cannot know.

    Besides, people in reality have created some common sense that is not worthy of serious consideration, or that hasn't yet been translated into written language, and cannot yet be called knowledge. But this common sense often outweighs the golden words of so-called celebrities, or solves problems that those golden words cannot. This is like a patient with a rare and intractable disease that neither traditional Chinese medicine nor Western medicine could cure, but who was cured by a folk remedy. We can determine who was effective in this case. Of course, I'm not advocating that folk remedies are better than traditional Chinese medicine or Western medicine; I'm just using this example to illustrate a point: in certain situations, only those who can solve the problem are heroes. As for those who succeed ninety-nine times but fail on the hundredth, they are not heroes, at least not in this context, although we cannot judge heroes solely by wins and losses. Even so, in my view, common sense is born from practice, and common sense verifies existing knowledge in practice. However, once knowledge is verified by common sense in practice, correct knowledge becomes equivalent to common sense, while knowledge awaiting verification is left idle. As for the common sense expanded in practice, although it may be greater than or equal to knowledge at this moment, cultured people who are good at summarizing and drawing on the strengths of various schools of thought will quickly compile those common sense pieces that are being recognized in practice into the realm of knowledge.

    In this way, common sense is packaged as knowledge, not only elevating their own status but also making it acceptable to those broad-minded, rustic elders. Because whether they are old men or intellectuals, they are all of the same blood, descendants of the same Chinese nation. It's like two brothers who often quarrel over trivial matters, but when facing external threats, they both understand one principle: internal stability must precede external defense. Knowledge and common sense are no exception. One may be farming at home, the other working in the public sphere, but they are brothers connected by blood. As long as they don't turn against each other, mutual tolerance is a given. Those at home help those outside, and those outside help those at home financially; neither can leave the other. Only with this division of labor can everyone live a good life. Knowledge is like gold stored in the national treasury, while common sense is like ore of unknown purity. Only after refinement does it become the radiant gold (knowledge). Without ore, there is no gold, but unrefined ore remains ore, not gold. Common sense and knowledge are like gold and ore—interdependent and indispensable!

    Common sense is something everyone must possess; it is the prerequisite for our survival. Perhaps some knowledge is of little use to most people. For example, functions are not relevant to a humanities or social sciences college graduate entering the workforce, as they not only didn't study mathematics in college, but also wouldn't apply it in their work. Studying functions is more suited to those who studied advanced mathematics in college than humanities or social sciences students. However, possessing some common sense is still essential. Perhaps the accumulation of common sense will enable us to handle matters objectively and fairly in many situations, without losing sight of the bigger picture. As for knowledge, it's like money deposited in a bank; over time, the principal increases and the interest grows. Therefore, accumulating common sense can make you worldly-wise, adept at navigating social situations, invincible, and wise in governing. Accumulating knowledge can make you simple and insightful, intelligent and refined, rebellious and capable, and even a leader.

    If we integrate the two, we will be invincible because of our mastery of common sense, and we will be intelligent and refined because of our mastery of knowledge. Only in a life built on common sense, and with that profound cultural foundation, can we go further and shine brighter amidst the unexpected storms of life.

Why write essays?

     When discussing essays, we cannot ignore Lu Xun. This great writer abandoned the creation of lengthy novels to focus most of his energy on essays because he valued their responsive, flexible, and incisive nature. Essays are like the nerves of the immune system, the limbs of offense and defense; they are daggers and javelins; capable of killing with a single, sharp blow; they can immediately react and resist harmful things. Some have advised Lu Xun to focus on novels and not essays. Let's see how Lu Xun responded. In the preface to his collection of essays, *Hua Gai Ji*, he wrote: "I think if there are such troublesome prohibitions in the palace of art, it's better not to enter. I'd rather stand in the desert watching the sand and stones fly, laughing loudly when happy, shouting loudly when sad, cursing loudly when angry..." See how bold this is, revealing the true nature of a literary figure.

    Unfortunately, decades later, the development of essays has been slow and unsatisfactory. We see that major literary forums are flooded with bland, sentimental romance novels that are wildly popular, while essays, like an unwanted stepchild, hide silently in a corner, rarely noticed or cared for. Is it that our era no longer needs essays, or that essays have become outdated and unable to keep up with the times? The answer is clearly no. In our materialistic age, we not only need essays, but also a large number of powerful essays full of passion and genuine critical spirit. I think if Lu Xun were alive today, perhaps our country would at least have fewer corrupt officials. With Lu Xun's indomitable spirit, those corrupt officials would be utterly humiliated and terrified at the mere thought of plotting something wrong. In this sense, essays can at least play a role in warning and purifying social atmosphere, and our era is sorely lacking in "Lu Xun-style" fighters.

    Logically, those most qualified to write essays should be those who wear the hat of "critic," since the essence of essays is primarily criticism. However, how many people in the world can truly be called "critics" in the real sense? Some wear the laurel of "critic" yet write nothing but meaningless praise and flattery, seemingly forgetting their responsibilities. There are actually quite a few such people. For example, we often see writers solemnly holding seminars on their works, gathering a bunch of so-called famous writers and critics to rave about their work, and then it's over. I find it laughable. What kind of groundbreaking masterpiece is so perfect that a seminar is just about discussing empty praise? It's utterly absurd, serving no positive purpose other than increasing publicity. Don't forget who the judges of a work are: the readers. Those truly timeless works are certainly not created through flattery; I doubt anyone would disagree with that.

    What I mean by saying this is that so-called critics who dare not even offer criticism of an ordinary work, fearing to offend anyone, how can we expect them to speak out for justice and attack the darkness of society? Can we rely on them to "shoulder the responsibility of upholding

    morality and write brilliant articles"? I think it's highly unlikely! Since those social elites are so hesitant to maintain their halos, shouldn't we ordinary people take up the weapon of essays to fight against the evils in society? I believe we can. Although we are of humble status, we also have a fervent love for our country and our nation. We write essays hoping that our society will have less falsehood and ugliness and more truth, goodness, and beauty. Although we are just commoners and have no influence, I still hope that more ordinary people who love writing will join the ranks of essayists, producing less frivolous talk and more writing that criticizes current affairs and promotes righteousness, because our era needs the latter more. As the

    saying goes, "Constant dripping wears away a stone; a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step." As long as more and more people realize the importance of essays, why worry about their future prosperity? If so, Mr. Lu Xun would surely rest in peace.

    In conclusion, I think our purpose in writing essays is quite clear: to criticize current malpractices, condemn evil, and promote righteousness. Ordinary people feel no pressure writing essays and can speak freely, which seems to be more profound than the essays written by celebrities. From this perspective, I personally believe that it is far more reliable for us, the grassroots, to inherit and carry forward Mr. Lu Xun's legacy than for social elites and celebrities.

    Therefore, for essays, we should not fear sharpness, depth, or incisiveness. What we should fear is timidity and confusion!

    In fact, discovering and praising beauty allows our souls to be cultivated and sublimated through the experience of beauty; discovering, praising, and deeply loving beauty enables us to distinguish right from wrong and to condemn ugliness!

What theme does Journey to the West reflect?

     What theme does *Journey to the West* truly reflect?

    I've asked many colleagues and friends this question, and most believe it reflects Sun Wukong's positive and optimistic spirit, his ability to subdue demons and monsters, his fearlessness in the face of hardship, and his indomitable fighting spirit!

    Is this truly the theme of the novel? Let's not rush to conclusions; let's first examine the specific plot of the novel!

    Before escorting Tang Sanzang on his journey to the West, why was Sun Wukong so invincible, causing havoc in the Heavenly Palace, the Underworld Palace, and the Dragon Palace? Even the Jade Emperor and the Dragon King were terrified of him. At that time, Sun Wukong was incredibly powerful, defeating heavenly soldiers and generals and leaving a trail of dust in his wake. But on the journey to the West to obtain the scriptures, why couldn't he defeat one small demon after another? It wasn't that the demons were more powerful, but rather that they possessed magical treasures—treasures of Buddhism.

    If we think about it carefully, such a great disturbance in the Heavenly Palace and the Dragon Palace, yet unable to escape the Buddha's palm, reveals the theme the work intends to reflect: the Buddha's teachings are boundless; only by converting to Buddhism can one achieve enlightenment. Regardless of one's innate nature or how powerful one's abilities, a good outcome is ultimately elusive.

    In feudal times, Sun Wukong (the Monkey King) perfectly satisfied the desires of the lower classes to resist autocratic oppression, overcome dark forces, conquer nature, and yearn for freedom. Sun Wukong's positive optimism and fighting spirit are an artistic summary of the long-term struggle of the Chinese people, a product of the combination of ideals and reality. In reality, most people are merely imagining things, indulging in a fleeting urge to rebel, but lack the courage to follow Sun Wukong's path. Of course, at this point, Sun Wukong gained a certain market. People saw Sun Wukong's fiery eyes, boundless magic, and extraordinary wisdom, but ultimately overlooked his inability to escape his master's golden headband, and the fact that every demon on the journey to the West needed reinforcements—these were the real reasons for his defeats. Mao Zedong's poem "Seven-Character Quatrain: Watching Sun Wukong Thrice Beat the White Bone Demon" elevates Sun Wukong to an unwarranted level. Given this cultural background, it's difficult to change the misunderstanding surrounding the theme of *Journey to the West*.

    Therefore, with these facts, it's not hard to determine the theme reflected in *Journey to the West*. I believe this novel does not reflect or praise Sun Wukong's rebellious spirit, but rather is an ancient novel reflecting religion!

    Let's take another example: what theme does *Water Margin* reflect? Many people believe this novel praises peasant uprisings, but this is not the case. This novel actually praises the emperor. The novel defines peasant uprisings as rebellions of bandits against corrupt officials, not rebellions against the emperor! Finally, the peasant uprising army is granted amnesty by the imperial court, effectively becoming legitimate, transforming from bandits into a regular army, much like how Empress Dowager Cixi recognized the legitimacy of the Boxer Rebellion. Here, Chairman Mao Zedong aptly put it: "The beauty of *Water Margin* lies in its role as a negative example, criticizing only corrupt officials, not the emperor."

    We often too easily swayed by tradition, public opinion, and trends. Faced with tradition, public opinion, and trends, we often cease to think critically, readily accepting popular opinions. Over time, this leads to the perpetuation of misinformation.

    This post is for exchange and discussion only. What theme do novels like *Journey to the West* reflect? Everyone is welcome to speak freely, express their views, and share their opinions!

    Literature emphasizes typification, but typification is by no means synonymous with vulgarization or commonplace expression. Once we forget that we still have brains, misunderstandings become inevitable. Therefore, we should, as Lu Xun said, "use our brains, broaden our horizons, and take matters into our own hands."

A Brief Discussion on Dining and Romance

     The Chinese are incredibly imaginative when it comes to food, arguably the world's best. Who else could create so much art and romance around something so basic and essential? They transform even the most mundane ingredients into exquisite dishes, captivating countless guests.

    Indeed, the Chinese are a romantic people, and even the most basic daily activity—eating—is given a special status. At the dinner table, people treat it as an opportunity to appreciate art and experience romance! They consider the food as a true work of art, paying attention not only to the taste, texture, color, aroma, and appearance, but also to the grandeur and atmosphere of the table. They strive to please not only the eyes, nose, and ears, but also the stomach and the heart. As you can see, whether in high-end restaurants and hotels or ordinary eateries, they are always packed with distinguished guests, enjoying exquisite dishes together. Guests, while enjoying the allure of the food, let their thoughts wander freely, exploring every imaginable realm until they are all bloated and staggering, truly reaching the romantic state of "a dazzling array of flowers!"

    Perhaps people are chivalrous, perhaps they can't bear to damage these works of art, perhaps they can't bear to swallow these exquisite treasures, so they display "style" and leave a large portion of these works of art on the table. As a result, these works of art quickly become piles of unpleasant odors, eventually becoming "great works of art" that end up alongside swill, pigs, dogs, and flies. Ultimately, this results in one province wasting 5,000 tons of food a day, with economic waste exceeding 1 billion yuan in six months – a "great romantic state." If one province is like this, the situation nationwide is even worse! How can such "romance" not be heartbreaking?

    Our country is not yet wealthy; only a small group of people are entitled to experience this kind of romance, and the "romance" of this small group has already caused enormous waste to society. Imagine if our society entered a prosperous and comfortable era, and everyone experienced this kind of "romance"—how wonderful would that be? However, while guests are savoring art and experiencing romance, countless people nearby are struggling for basic necessities, worrying about their children's education and their family's medical care. In such a situation, would guests still have the mood to appreciate art and experience romance?

    In today's society, which strongly advocates for a conservation-oriented society, guests can continue to appreciate art and experience romance. But they should not violate social morality and customs, mistaking the sour for art and the outdated for romance!

Let's make progress together under the same blue sky.

     Foreword: In today's society, migrant workers have made tremendous contributions to the construction of modern cities in China. However, due to various factors, it is difficult for their children to integrate into urban civilization. Look at the towering buildings and sturdy bridges! They are the best testament to their hard work and sweat, the crystallization of their toil under the scorching sun. My heart is filled with emotion...

    Since the reform and opening up, along with the continuous acceleration of China's socialist urbanization, a large new labor force—migrant workers—has emerged. Migrant workers are scattered throughout the country, from east to west, from south to north, their endearing presence felt. They have created one great miracle after another for the construction of China's socialist modern market economy! However, in recent years, due to the mobility of migrant workers' work and local protectionism, the problem of migrant workers' children's access to education has become increasingly prominent and remains high. The main reasons are:

    First, most migrant workers live in relatively difficult circumstances and cannot afford the high fees for attending schools outside their registered area. Surveys show that 50% of migrant workers have a monthly income of less than 600 yuan, while the cost of attending public junior high schools in some areas is around 1,000 yuan per semester. Sometimes even basic survival is a problem, let alone sending children to school.

    Secondly, due to the high mobility of migrant workers, some schools are unwilling to accept the children of migrant workers whose household registration is outside the city.

    Thirdly, migrant workers' children face immense psychological pressure when attending school. Some schools have implemented separate classes for migrant workers' children, and some have even prohibited them from participating in awards and competitions. One migrant worker's child wrote in their diary: "My mother never buys me new clothes for the New Year, and my classmates laugh at my family for being poor. I feel terrible." "They laugh at me for not knowing how to play games and not buying me snacks. I really hate them." "My Mandarin isn't standard, and my classmates always laugh at me. I'm afraid to speak anymore."

    These various reasons severely restrict the educational opportunities for migrant workers' children, making it even more difficult for them to integrate into urban life.

    Today, when we sit in spacious, bright classrooms, do we think of the countless migrant workers' children like us struggling to access education? When we skip school, do we remember the yearning for education in the eyes of countless other migrant workers' children? When we complain about life, do we remember the countless migrant workers' children struggling in the sea of ​​hardship?

    Solving the problem of education difficulties for migrant workers' children is no longer just a topic, but an urgent issue that needs to be addressed. I personally believe we should start from the following aspects:

    First, further strengthen support for the education of migrant workers' children. The government should increase financial investment and call on all sectors of society to donate funds to help economically disadvantaged migrant workers' children. Second

    , further improve and reform the education system, introduce relevant policies and regulations, reduce or waive tuition fees for children attending schools outside their registered area, and ensure that migrant workers' children receive an equal education.

    Finally, encourage public schools to enroll migrant workers' children and urge schools to provide them with a variety of activities to foster mutual understanding and learning between them and urban children.

    "Under the same blue sky, growing and progressing together"—this was a phrase Premier Wen Jiabao wrote on Teachers' Day in 2003 after inspecting a school for the children of migrant workers in Beijing. It deeply expressed the boundless care of the Party Central Committee and the State Council for the children of migrant workers.

    Today, as we see rows of high-rise buildings rising from the ground, highways successfully opened to traffic, and magnificent overpasses, what are our thoughts? The children of migrant workers are equal to urban children in terms of human dignity; they also have the right to education. We believe that with the continuous development of China's economy and the continuous progress of society, the educational opportunities for the children of migrant workers will usher in a bright future!

The Buddha's Explanation of the Shocking Causes and Effects of Smog

     Recently, severe smog has plagued the entire country. From large first-tier cities to smaller second- and third-tier cities, all have been hit by an unprecedented blanket of smog. I've been wondering why there's such heavy smog. I'm puzzled. Online searches for the causes of smog mostly point to environmental damage, air pollution, and vehicle exhaust… While these external factors undeniably play a significant role, why haven't other countries experienced similar situations without suffering such widespread and prolonged smog? From a causal perspective, what karmic forces are at play? Is there any way to resolve this? We consulted Buddhist scriptures and found the answer.

    In the *Sutra on the Differences in Karmic Retribution Explained by the Buddha to the Elder Sudatta*: "

    There are ten kinds of karma that bring external evil retribution. If sentient beings frequently practice these ten unwholesome deeds, they will experience a lack of abundance in all external things.

    First, the karma of killing causes external retribution such as saline soil and ineffective medicinal herbs.

    Second, the karma of stealing causes external retribution such as frost, hail, locusts, and other pests, leading to famine.

    Third, the karma of sexual misconduct causes evil winds and rains." And all dust. (Note: Fog and haze are mainly formed by dust. Tiny particles in the air gather and condense with water vapor, floating in the air to form fog and haze.)

    Fourth, due to the karma of false speech, all external objects will be foul and filthy. Fifth

    , due to the karma of divisive speech, the external earth will be uneven, with steep cliffs and deep valleys, and overgrown plants.

    Sixth, due to the karma of harsh speech, the external retribution will be coarse and unpleasant things such as tiles, stones, and gravel, which are untouchable. Seventh, due

    to the karma of frivolous speech, the external retribution will be dense forests with thorny branches.

    Eighth, due to the karma of greed, the external retribution will be that all seedlings and crops will have small and insignificant seeds.

    Ninth, due to the karma of anger, the external retribution will be that all trees and fruits will be bitter and astringent. Tenth,

    due to the karma of wrong views, the external retribution will be that seedlings and crops will not bear fruit, and the harvest will be meager.

    These are the ten karmas. We suffer unforeseen consequences.

    Let's reflect carefully on the various scenarios we see on the internet, on television, and in society today. These scenarios indeed demonstrate that desires in this world are constantly intensifying. This should serve as a wake-up call, reminding us to pay attention to environmental protection both outwardly and inwardly. Let's work together to strengthen the environmental protection of our minds!

Why are people so loyal to the word "love"?

     Have all the "good men" in China died out? How are we single men supposed to survive in this world?

    Last year, Wen Zhang and Huang Haibo were both national "good men" and "good husbands" active in TV dramas and movies, but then Wen Zhang was exposed for cheating and Huang Haibo for soliciting prostitutes, shocking the nation.

    This year, Chen He has been in a series of scandals. First, he was exposed for having an affair with Zhang, then came the divorce agreement, then he cried in front of fans, and then he was caught kissing by Fengxing (China's top paparazzi team). Chen He has really had it all. His team attacked a high school senior (someone who commented on Chen He's Weibo post and was a high school senior, who later received hundreds of thousands of negative comments). I wouldn't know this if it weren't for this. Six months after the divorce, he accompanied his wife on a TV show and even published a book about how to become a good man. I don't know how chaotic the entertainment industry is; what happens in the industry is just for outsiders to see.

    This will probably shock many brainless women (I personally admire good men and think that whatever they do is right). Actually, there are good men in the entertainment industry. Take Chen Daoming (who drank Heqizheng herbal tea), for example. He was never known for any scandals, and he was known for his honesty and integrity, maintaining his true self in the dark world. I really admire him. Lin Zhiying is another good man. He's considerate and attentive to his wife. The key to a good man is whether he can maintain his true self.

    The currently popular drama "My Sunshine" has captivated countless women. I also quite like Wallace Chung. I first learned about him when I was in elementary school, watching him in "The Four Great Constables." Later, in middle school, I was mesmerized by his role in "The Line of Fire." Actually, I haven't watched a complete episode of "My Sunshine," only a 15-minute trailer before it aired. After watching it, I felt it would be a hit, and sure enough, it became a huge success, captivating countless young girls and middle-aged women alike. Countless women were smitten, but like the Yellow River flowing from the sky, it never returns to the sea. Like the endless flow of the Yangtze River, or the uncontrollable flooding of the Yellow River. In reality, every woman has a kind of unwavering devotion to love, hoping that a man will remain steadfast in his affections. Therefore, this drama captured women's emotions, which is why it became so popular. In truth, it's just an ordinary romance drama, but it forced my friend to constantly post about He Yichen on her social media. I guess I was forced to block her updates. A man waited seven years for one woman; I only believe fairy tales are lies.

    A few days ago, I saw a news report about a man kneeling at a university, begging a girl for forgiveness. Bystanders pleaded with him to no avail and left, only to find the university was already on holiday. Isn't that ridiculous? The devoted lover didn't find his true love and was instead innocently mocked. He lost his dignity and face, and in the end, he had to stand up himself, probably with numb legs, perhaps muttering, "Damn it, they're on holiday!" Sometimes, exchanging dignity for love, you get her body but not her heart.

    Actually, I remember my grandfather saying that he found partners through introductions, from one village to another. Back then, relationships were stable; if they felt it was right after just a few days of meeting, they'd get married. Now, some people think that wasn't love at all. In the past, women would cook, do laundry, wipe sweat, and bring water to their husbands after marriage. My grandfather said that feelings were cultivated after marriage; over time, affection would develop. They could live a stable, ordinary, but happy life. Later, my grandmother passed away, and my grandfather didn't remarry. He said she died of illness at around fifty. I never met my grandmother; I only saw her in old, yellowed photos. Although she was a rural woman, she was clearly very shrewd.

    Now, society is developed; relationships are cultivated before marriage. Who still cultivates feelings after marriage? After marriage, it's more likely to be a mistress, or even a fourth or fifth. With the downfall of high-ranking and corrupt officials, the exposure of mistresses is quite common.

    In real life, why do people fall for "love," become troubled by it, trapped by it, hurt by it, and even die for it? What is love in this world, that it makes one want to vomit? We always strive for love, to fight for love, to revel in love. Yet, what we get in return is heartbreak for most, and happiness for only a few.

    I'm reminded of a song by Tianyou called "Women, Listen Up." After listening to it, I sighed, "Tianyou, you've been hurt too deeply by women, you can't escape it. I'm afraid to love again." Afraid of being played by women, afraid of being hurt after giving my heart. Then I thought, "It's nothing, you've just encountered that kind of woman, I haven't met her yet, but I believe there are still good women in the world." After hearing that song, I found another one called "Men, Listen Up." I sighed again, "Woman, you've been played too badly by men! This song will move so many women, some even believing there are no good men left, changing their online names to 'men are all bad,' and their signatures to 'hate all men.'" I smiled and chuckled. A sigh tinged with helplessness. The sigh held a hint of sorrow, yet also a touch of relief. Thank goodness I wasn't married, I didn't toy with women, I didn't deceive their feelings. I believe I'm still a good man.

    In life, there's a chubby man with glasses, a shop manager, nearly thirty and single. He has a peculiar habit: whenever a woman drives by, he greets her with a lecherous smile, especially attractive women. My guess is he has too many targets and can't decide which woman to focus on. Of course, that might not be it. For thirty years, he's only focused on women.

    Then there are those with little education, who dropped out of junior high to work. They say "delete someone" as "book someone," and "happy birthday" as "happy life." The latter might be due to typing too fast on their phone, but what about the former? He likes someone but doesn't dare tell them directly, asking for help instead. As a friend, I'll help, because I used to ask for help too, since it was my first love. If the person you like politely rejects you, you should be happy, because they've saved you face. You should also wish them happiness in finding their own. If the person you like rudely rejects you, saying you're no good at this or that, don't be angry. Instead, be happy for yourself. You were blind back then because you didn't see her clearly; now that you do, shouldn't you be grateful?

    Speaking of love, there's a big difference between the last century and the present. Let's talk about romance. Back then, economic conditions weren't as developed. Even holding hands while dating felt sweet. Romance was especially precious at night, sitting on the edge of a field looking at the stars. During the day, they'd hum a tune, the man humming one, the woman humming one too. In the summer, the man would go to the lotus pond or the river to catch fish, cook them, and secretly eat them together—it was so romantic. Romance is different now. With the economy developed, a friend told me about his girlfriend's birthday and asked me to go shopping with him. He bought her a bouquet of flowers, hid them behind his back when he saw her, and then, ta-da, presented them to her. She was very happy, and they played, sang, and had fun together. She came back saying how romantic it was. If this happened to me, I wouldn't feel any romance at all. Perhaps this is the most honest sentiment expressed by someone who has never been in love. I'm even thinking, wouldn't it be ugly if the flowers withered? Why give her a necklace when you've given her flowers? A meal would be much more practical.

    There are too many men in the world, but good men are neither too many nor too few. They bring happiness to their loved ones, are loyal to them, make them happy, and make promises to them. This is the heartfelt sentiment of us single men.

    However, many people focus on love, yet feel as if they've lost a bit of family affection, lessened their friendships, and gained a bit more indifference. So, be good to your family, be good to your friends, be loyal to those who love you, and you'll gain a deeper understanding.